| 30 reasons it's great to be male 1. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. 2. You don't have to monitor your friends' sex lives. 3. You don't have to remember everyone's birthdays and anniversaries. 4. You can open all your own jars. 5. Old friends don't give you crap if you've lost or gained weight. 6. A beer gut does not make you invisible to the opposite sex. 7. You don't have to lug a bag of useful stuff around everywhere you go. 8. You can leave a hotel bed unmade. 9. When your work is criticized, you don't have to panic that everyone secretly hates you. 10. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. 11. You see the humour in Terms of Endearment. 12. Nobody secretly wonders if you swallow. 13. You never have to clean the toilet. 14. Wedding plans take care of themselves. 15. Your underwear is $10 for a three pack. 16. None of your co-workers have the power to make you cry. 17. You don't have to shave below your neck. 18. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. 19. You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger seat. 20. You can wear a white shirt to a water park. 21. Three pair of shoes are more than enough. 22. You don't have to clean your apartment if the meter reader is coming by. 23. You never feel compelled to stop a pal from getting laid. 24. You don't give a rat's ass if someone notices your new haircut. 25. If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you might become lifelong buddies. 26. The world is your urinal. 27. Hot wax never comes near your pubic area. 28. People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them. 29. You can buy condoms without the shopkeeper imagining you naked. 30. You needn't pretend you're "freshening up" to go to the bathroom. |